Same LONG Day...Guess I woke TO Say...

Never Said I was An Artist

"Da las coupa days et mysa house I'sa coold." The world newest language, Ebonics.
It's now 12:14 and I have just gotten on the
Eastbound
to
Greenville.
One Hour and Thirty four minutes late.
I wonder if he will be happy to see me.
It's been about 8 years or so.
From
There
To
Here.
Puberty to womanhood.
If You would call Me that.
According to
Books
Magazines
Tobacco companies
and
Alcohol distributors
I
Am.
What a trip, huh?
I can legally suck cancer and or drink myself to kidney failure. What a lucky...Woman.

I am scared how fast this Big Gray Dog is taking these curves in the rain.

It's all flat in Arkansas. At least right here. Let me describe what I see.
Walking trails
A lake
From man or
God
I do not know, because of the rain.
Water towers and a patch
Of
Pine beetle ridden trees.
And yellow and gold leaves.
Maybe a slight roll to the land.
Looks like Jasper.

Fresh out of Mexico- green card in hand?
What a journey
To an unfamiliar country.
Unfamiliar races
Unfamiliar faces.
A foreign language
A foreign culture.

Who am I kidding?
There is huge city like communes
Where they gather and create
The SAME
Atmosphere they left.
Poor
Hungry
Dirty
Living in shanties with ten of their kin.
But how can you succeed when there is
No one to believe in.
You?
...Me?...
ssssslllleeeeeepppppp.

Wednesday Nov.28 2001 and it is still RaiNINg

Raining, raining, even here in Texarkana, Arkansas.
I
SEE
Chilly "folks" blowing eternal streams of smoke from their chattering mouths.
Too cold to smoke.
Too cold to talk to Bob
Wasn't banking too much on the cold. I already miss Houston, although I know it's cold there, too, right now. I am more excited about seeing my Uncle Dub or Wesley or Wes or Dub or whatever. I could never take the Uncle off.

Bought a watch
From a
Black man.
"A business man"
He said.
Bought a watch
From a
Black man
In Houston
For 10$.
Gave another
Black man
A twenty.
He
Never
Came
Back.
Neither did the bag. And the watch...
Broke.

Why is remembering so often followed by the need to forget?
I wonder if I can sleep all the way to Greenville.
Teaspoon of night time should do it.
Should fix me right up.

Can't wait to hit the casino and get a buzzzzzzzzzzzzz....sleep.

Glenlivet, Glenfiddich
You are friends of mine.
"A girl who knows her scotch,"
in a sarcastic sing-song fashion, please.
Laughing at the ridiculousness of that
statement.
And
The
Predictability.

ThE cHaNgInG oF ThE MiNd

April 6, 2010
Last Night I attempted to erase all of this. Everything I had posted, beginning to end.
It
Did
Not
Erase.
This was quite a journey that I took and several observations
I
Made.
Watching
Other
People.
Wandering,
Wondering
About my Future.
Maybe it was not meant to be erased.
For
No
Other
Person
But
Me

Tuseday November 2001 The Bus Station

It's raining.
Here comes the rain again
Falling down my head
Like a memory ...
How I love this the
cold
front
That has blown in.

I'm on my way to somewhere.

"Try not to think of the big picture,
it is much to overwhelming",
She is so intelligent the wrong words never fail her.

My Greyhound leaves the station at 1:00 a.m.

I am on my way to somewhere.

I brought some nighttime cough syrup with me to help me sleep though
the transition.

Twenty til Twelve...says the BIG ROUND CLOCK
Take Your time,
Time.
I
Need
All
The
Seconds
I Can Get.

Still Listening At The Station November 27,2001

"I think I am getting married," said the boy.
"To who?" said the other.
"I do not know."
"Why then?" said the other again.
"Someone to be with."
"Is that all?"
"Oh Yeah, and love." the boy finished.

You never really know what is going to fall out of the masses collective mouths. You never really know what you are going to hear until you...sssh... listen.
Maybe me observing other people will help me...sssh...keep MY mouth shut.

The Sounds
Of all the differemt voices
buzzing around my head.
The thunder comes now...
And I think we have a beat.

Traveling

YOU.

Where are you?

It is could outside, the wind winding its way through dirty Houston streets, peeking under skirts and hiding

under plastic grocery bags.

It is lightning out there also

Like Aleigha likes it.

Blinking on and off like

fading

flourescent

light

bulbs.

"I like to get'em the right way."

"What's the right way?" I said.

"I don't know."

Conversation between the army kid and myself. I, searching for some sense in the dialogue. Or something.

Does Everything Have To Have A Title?

I am thinking second thoughts about this.

Thats funny.

I used to just shoot first and ask questions later

But right now I feel like I have an apple on my head so...

My aim is kind of off... That will be self-evident and therin lies the

Solution.

I am not on a bus right now headed to Mississippi. The rain isn't pouring and I am on no physical journey. Only a proverbial one. The things our lives have contained has made us who we are. And everyone is special in their own way. YadaYada, I just say that crap to keep from hurting peoples feelings the "special in their own way" bit. I guess I am trying to say that we all have a journey we need to take. ALone. Experience something in this world that the person beside you can't say..." I did that too..." Do something for you and let that something form you, not define you.